February 2009
After dang near 11 years of downloading things I probably shouldn’t, I finally got slapped with my first DMCA letter yesterday. And it was for something I really didn’t even want, I just kind of grabbed on a whim. But of course.
Now I’m on THE PERMANENT FILE OH NOES.
January 2009
What exactly do you say at 11am? Good Morning? Good Afternoon? It’s not technically after noon, but I certainly wouldn’t call it morning.
“Good Midday Greeting to you!”
Wow, I hit a wall on posting today. I got nothin’.
“I’m addicted to those nasty-ass hot pork rinds, but they’re probably...”
– Hooper, on the new snack machine prices.
discovery of the day.
coffeeandacasio:
ben konop is on wikipedia. (wow.) it’s hard to take a politician seriously when he comes into the coffee shop you work at on a frequent basis, and acts like a big d-bag every time.
It’s funny because it’s true. Guy is a total toolbag.
First Interview with Vince from ShamWow →
Darren: What do you think of legendary infomercial guy, Billy Mays?
Vince: That’s his career and he gets commissions and he’s good at what he does with some of the products.
Darren: People say you might be better. That you’re the next Billy Mays.
Vince: I don’t want to be. I’m in the film business, this is not my career.
The Onion - Chipotle Employee Just Gave Guy In... →
Since noticing the rice disparity moments ago, you have considered a number of tactics to rectify the situation, including hesitating slightly before advancing to the beans and meat in order to convey your concern; staring intently at the other burrito in hopes of drawing attention to its incongruent size; and simply asking the Chipotle employee for a little more rice.
Witnesses at the scene...
“So, what part of the murder-suicide do you want to be on?”
– Me, to Phil. Things have not gone well today.
What kind of day are YOU having?
1happyst:
I get on the elevator to go to lunch. When I reach the lobby, I stick my right hand into my pocket and notice that my wallet isn’t there.
Crap! I must have left it upstairs on my desk.
I hop back on the elevator and head back up. I reach my desk.
Son of a bitch, it’s not there. What did I do with it?
Oh there it is. In my left hand.
I’ve been there, and I’ve done...
Office Dictionary
Hardcore Pornography - Code for “job listings.”
“It’s 1:30. Time to look at Hardcore Pornography.”
Watchcommacommachameleon:pilnick:The teatime deluge
Four nights a week, as one of the most popular shows in Britain ends, millions of kettles are turned on to make tea. With an ending time provided by the BBC, the national balancing engineer on-duty has to anticipate this ‘TV pickup,’ an increase of 3 gigawatts over 5 minutes, and can activate specialized hydroelectric plants that can drop thousands...
NBC's Super Bowl Production By The Numbers →
450- More than 450 people will be part of the NBC production, technical, administrative and support crews
93- Microphones (including 12 on-field parabolic microphones)
52- High Definition Cameras (2 SD Cameras for Game Clock and Play Clock)
50- Miles of Camera and Microphone cable
45- Vehicles (control trucks, mobile units, office trailers, Horse Trailer)
24- Digital Video Replay Sources
...
have fun, word nerds. →
onemoretimewithfeeling:
themattsmith:
(via dataxemotion)
Thank you, Wordsmith Anagram Finder, for telling me that the only anagram of my name that makes any sense is “Wham Them Tits”.
My favorite: Challenge Commie Hug
Butch Mat Alert.
WAIT… going with “Matthew” instead of “Matt”, I get Bleach Thwart Mute. That’s awesome.
BUT WAIT… forcing...
“We live in an amazing, amazing world, and it’s wasted on the crappiest...”
– Louis C.K. Watch the whole thing. Brilliant.
(via morrisonfilm) (via peroty)
I love Louis C.K. (via onemoretimewithfeeling)
Why So Curious? →
xstevemurphy:
Why so curious? | Filmonic
I can’t reblog the picture proper, as my daughter would have a meltdown. But it’s funny.
Wikipedia: Euchre variations →
For some players in the Midwest, when a team has nine points, players place the score cards next to each other, face down. The team is now “in the barn” (also “on the corner”) or “mooing”. Some players have also been known to place the two score cards behind their ears upon “entering the barn.” A celebration ceremony involved with “entering the...
Getting my car back after it’s been in an accident is a lot like I’d imagine seeing a friend after he’s spent a year in a mental ward.
“Oh, the driver’s side door squeaks? Well, you know, after what he’s been through, he just does that now.”
hiyayaahiyyahiyhaaahiya →
I… I… I… ah… umm…. ahhh…. okay then.
Everything But the Girl - No Difference
I was...
Chicken Wing Shortage Threatens To Destroy Super... →
Noted chicken separator Pilgrim’s Pride Corp. filed for bankruptcy protection on December 1, which in these troubled times is not that unusual. The problem is that they supply roughly one quarter of the 24 billion “wing segments” that were eaten last year.
DAMN YOU ECONOMY
marco:
@danielpunkass:
Office chair mats are surprisingly expensive considering they are just a big piece of plastic.
That’s because chair mats are high-profit add-ons for office retailers (Staples, OfficeMax, Office Depot).
The same way they’re pushed to sell $30 gold-plated USB cables and extended warranties with every printer, Staples employees are pushed very hard to sell chair mats and...
“We’ll be back in two shakes of a lamb’s tail. A reeeaaaallly...”
– Me, on a promo I recorded for the station’s webstream. I forgot I recorded that, it’s kinda funny.
travors:
Mary Jane’s Last Dance - Tom Petty.
...